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The Connection between Deep Feelings and Insight
For those of you who know me, or who have read my previous articles or books, you know that I experienced a great deal of resistance to Sydney Banks’ message of hope and transformation. When I heard Syd say, “People create experience via Thought,” that idea evoked fear in me. I backed away from taking responsibility for my unhappiness, truly believing that my misery was caused by external circumstances; we had very little money, my family relationships were poor, and there seemed to be no opportunity for change to occur in my life.
My resistance increased as time went on. I saw Syd blossom, and this disturbed me. His relationship with his wife, Barb (who passed away in 1986), flourished after he had his profound experience. Although she too had some initial resistance, within a short period of time she had an insight that allowed her own wisdom to unfold. From then on, she steadfastly helped Syd on his path of sharing his discovery with the world.
As Syd’s relationship with his wife thrived, I watched with jealousy and longing; a dichotomy to be sure. On one hand, I longed for the same deep feeling of love and joy I saw expressed in their relationship; on the other hand, I resented that they were experiencing such beautiful feelings, and I wasn’t.
Yet the feeling of compassion and understanding emanating from Syd filled my heart and offered me comfort. The feeling moved me into peace of mind, a mental space I seldom visited. I wanted more of that deep feeling, but how to get there was a puzzle to me.
Syd always talked about the power of deep feelings. He would say things like, “Just listen; if you get a beautiful feeling, that’s it. That’s what you’re looking for. That beautiful feeling is where all the answers lie.”
I wanted to believe him, but found it very, very difficult. Nonetheless, in spite of myself and my resistance, I sought out Syd’s company so I could feel happy by osmosis. Little did I know that the deep feeling I was experiencing was my True Self being woken up, little by little.
At one point, while I was at my lowest ebb, Syd and Barb arrived at our home for a spontaneous visit and knocked on the door. I dreaded their company, yet it was after that brief but significant visit that I had my own watershed moment.
I realized it was my thinking that was creating my resistance. My inner struggle had nothing to do with my circumstances, or with Syd’s sharing true knowledge with me. It was me, using the power of Thought against myself, in innocence. With that realization, my world opened up in a way I had never imagined possible; leading to a life far beyond any of my early dreams of being a contented wife and mother, with an exciting career, and a chance to travel and experience the world beyond my narrow confines.
It wasn’t too long after that turning point in my life, when Syd suggested Ken and I share what we had learned in our hometown of Nanaimo, with people interested in the Three Principles. We had many amusing experiences and, frankly, some not as entertaining, as we offered what little we knew to those who came to the meetings we hosted. At first, we invited friends and colleagues to our home; as the groups got larger, we found small community centers to hold the meetings.
Sometimes Syd would come and talk to the group and of course, those sessions were outstanding. We would see people melt with the warmth and humor he brought to his talks; people we had found difficult to reach, when we were conducting the groups, were having insights in the moment while Syd talked. How he did this was unfathomable to me; I just watched with respect, and in total admiration.
Other times, we did the best we could on our own; sharing our insights and more importantly, sharing the feeling of gratitude for discovering something so essential in the human psyche.
With the Principles being so new to me, there were times when my old ego took hold if I was challenged during a meeting. I would hold firm to make a point, without really listening to the other person.
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I remember one fellow saying to me, “You’re just into your ego, Elsie.”
I responded indignantly and emphatically, “No, I’m not!”
We went back and forth for a few minutes until I realized how silly this was, and that of course I was gripped by my ego when a situation like this occurred, and the feeling became negative. Funny thing; once I stopped persisting in my personal opinion, so did he. . .
We learned a great deal about the importance of keeping the feeling positive during our meetings, and how to listen with respect; especially when someone got stuck in their own thinking and couldn’t feel their inner spirit. Those times were the most critical in our early learning, because we saw the power of the deep feeling that is released from within, and how that feeling settles people down so they can hear their own wisdom, and gain insight.
During the time we were learning to share with people in Nanaimo, Syd, Barb and their family had already moved to Salt Spring Island, where he began in earnest to offer his service to humanity. People were drawn to him as if by a spiritual magnet. Individuals struggling with mental health issues came down his driveway and knocked at his door, saying, “I hear you can help people.” Syd was always so kind, and would tell the person that he was not a doctor or psychologist, but they were welcome to come in for a cup of tea. So many incredible transformations took place over a cup of tea.
Countless people came from all over the world; gurus from India, self-awareness leaders from Europe and North America, CEO’s of major companies, ordinary people looking for help, for a better way to live life. If you asked them how they had heard of Syd, they often told a mystical story of how they arrived on the island.
I remember when a group of human development specialists from Europe arrived on Salt Spring. Syd invited us over to meet with them. During a moment of casual conversation, I asked how they had heard of Syd. One fellow responded that he had spoken with a colleague in the States, who told him of a rumor about an unusual occurrence that had taken place on an island; an account about an ordinary man who had had a transcendent experience, and now knew something beyond the realm of the physical. Their organization wanted to learn more about this. He said it was a “feeling” that prompted them to investigate this extraordinary story.
Another man who came to the island told me he had seen a photo of Syd on a poster at an awareness center in Vancouver, and was struck by the look of serenity on Syd’s face. When he asked the staff about it, no one really knew how the poster had gotten there, or who Syd was, but they encouraged the man to go to Salt Spring to meet him. They said Syd looked like a very wise man who could help people.
There are thousands of stories like this. The one thing they all have in common is that the individuals were drawn to Syd by the “feeling;” a feeling that Syd knew something that offered hope and solace to humanity.
I’m often asked by people who are new to the Three Principles understanding how to share this gift with others. They’ve had an insight that has changed their lives, and now feel compelled to share what they’ve found.
When we share the gift of the Principles, it is the powerful force of love from within that acts as a catalyst to awaken the dormant self in others. Love promotes the feeling of safety and openness which leads to insight—each person’s own insight, which is pertinent to that person’s individual, unique life.
The Three Principles Syd uncovered reveal the knowledge that people have the power and the right to touch the living essence within their own soul; that essence is our birthright, our natural spiritual home. Here is where insights are born; insights that correct our lives, alleviate our suffering, and restore the harmony with our spiritual Self.
January 20, 2012
Elsie Spittle
© 3 Principles for Human Development, Inc.
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