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Previous Wisdom for Life Columns
A Message of Hope Enjoying the Simple Things in Life A Moment in Time Thriving versus Surviving Accepting Your True Identity Trust Your Own Wisdom
Our
birthright is innate mental health, another way of saying innate wisdom.
The wisdom we are born with is not of this world. Wisdom is from the
spiritual realm before the form of our world. What happens over time is
that our natural wisdom can be covered up by our concerns about life, not
trusting that when we live life in alignment with our true self, we will
be taken care of, no matter where we are or what situation we find
ourselves in. As
practitioners, all we need do is point our clients in the direction of
their own wisdom. We give them hope that all is well inside their soul.
When people get a glimmer of this spiritual fact, they get a deep feeling
of well being, which is wisdom expressing itself. The feeling of well
being is what heals people spiritually from the inside-out. Sydney
Banks says on The Hawaii Lectures DVD, “Oneness of Life” that
“you’re all sitting here enlightened – you just don’t know it”.
I’ve listened to that tape for years but I couldn’t quite “hear”
what he was saying. His declaration was too powerful for me to hear.
Recently I was in Hawaii and happened to play his DVD again. This time I
was able to hear his emphatic statement a bit more, to allow the words to
emerge from my soul. I see that innate mental health is part of
enlightenment. All we need do is open up to what is. Consider
the implications of this. When people present their issues, of course we
listen with respect and empathy. Then a moment in time occurs when we know
that to listen any more to the details of the problem only reinforces the
problem. When we, as practitioners, go “home” to our own wisdom, we
can invite our clients’ home as well. When
we are strong in what we know, that we are spiritual beings living in a
spiritual reality, we don’t tend to get caught up in the “story” of
others’ realities or even our own reality. We begin to see the
illusionary nature of life. Evidence of the illusionary nature of life is
seeing how our experience changes as our thinking changes. By wisely using
the divine Principles of Mind, Consciousness and Thought our reality
continues to improve. I
know there are many in the world dedicated to helping others who are
living in wretched circumstances and I applaud their efforts. I also know
that you can help people change the form of their reality and effectively
help transform their lives. The larger picture of permanent, sustainable
change must come from a shift in the world’s level of consciousness.
When that spiritual shift happens, the atrocities that are occurring will
begin to diminish because people who are mentally healthy lead healthy
lives. Countless
people who have committed various crimes and ended up in prison have been
introduced to the Principles, had a shift in their level of consciousness
that changed their lives. A man who continues to serve time for
manslaughter has embraced the Principles and teaches other inmates how to
live with hope, despite their incarceration. He is a role model for
finding peace of mind while confined. What
does this tell us? That it is never too late to change; that wisdom moves
in mysterious ways, helping those less fortunate to become fortunate; that
there is more to life than the form of life; that there is something
beyond the form that we are all part of, that we are One. An
example comes to mind of how wisdom emerges when we allow time and space.
Last summer after I conducted a seminar for a group, a participant asked
to meet with me later that day for a private session. I hesitated, wanting
to be of service, and then to my surprise these words came out of me.
“Take the time for your own wisdom to emerge, and frankly, I feel the
same need for myself, for my wisdom to manifest.” The
participant was gracious in accepting my response and I offered to talk
with this person at a future date. A couple of weeks later I heard from
the individual that he had gained much knowledge as he had time to reflect
on his own. He commented on how powerful the experience was for him to
realize it was his own wisdom coming to light, not mine. At
the same seminar, another individual asked to see me privately. Her needs
tugged at my heart strings so I agreed. When I met with her the next day,
she wanted to talk about her problems. Instead I talked to her about the
spiritual nature of life and encouraged her to trust her own innate wisdom
to resolve her difficulties. I could see she wanted to believe what I was
saying even while she struggled with this but I gently and respectfully
refused to entertain her “story”. I
felt a peace come over me as I held to the truth that nothing is resolved
by focusing on the problems. We sat in silence for some time. I could feel
her calm down as we experienced the feeling of peace together. After a
time, she stood up and quietly said, “Thanks, Elsie. I feel the truth of
what you are saying. The quiet time we just spent moved me out of my
problem solving dilemma. I don’t understand exactly how but I feel
it.” Her
words struck a chord in me. It’s so true; we don’t have to understand
exactly how the Principles work. As a matter of fact, we never will
understand them intellectually. As Syd says, we are already enlightened;
we just need to realize it. And we do, every time we have an insight, it
comes from that place, again in Syd’s words, “beyond time, space and
matter”. Elsie
Spittle December
1, 2009 ©
3 Principles for Human Development, Inc.
Allow
me to introduce you to your true Self; the inner you, the divine spark
within all humanity that is perfect. Not everyone knows about their true
Self. If you have met before, that is wonderful. If you have not had the
pleasure, let me say that you are in for a treat. Another
way of talking about true Self is saying that everyone is blessed with
innate mental health. Do we utilize our mental health to the fullest? I
think not. The spiritual process of discovering that we do have this
inherent gift within us is an ongoing development. What
is so remarkable about discovering our true nature is that we don’t have
to “try” to improve ourselves or “try” to do better. Once we
realize we have this divine spark within us, we automatically begin to
change for the better. Effortless change is part of the package, the gift
we are born with. If change is hard, it is because our ego belief system
will not take a back seat. Our birthright is to enjoy life, the best we
can, in all its manifestations. You
might say what if I’m in prison? How can I possibly enjoy life while
I’m incarcerated? Someone else might ask, what about the homeless? How
can they possibly enjoy life while living in a cardboard box on the
street? To
respond to both questions, let me tell you a story. I worked with the
homeless for over 4 years in downtown Los Angeles, in the heart of skid
row. I saw miracles take place there. I saw love and respect blossom on
the streets, between the staff of the organization I worked with and the
street people. I
observed the staff come up with creative ideas on how to reach out to the
homeless in an unusual way. Rather than continuing to meet people with
clipboard in hand, asking questions about what they were up to and how
they could be of service, the staff took a different path. The
service providers intuitively felt the population they were serving wanted
to be treated as ordinary folks, not labelled as homeless and therefore
often patronized. Several of the staff had once been on the streets
themselves and knew what it felt like. But prior to the Three Principles
education the helpers were unsure how to accomplish this. How do you help
people who clearly are struggling to survive while still preserving their
dignity? Before
the staff learned that everyone is born with purity of soul, they tended
to treat the behavior they observed. This time they were seeing beyond the
behavior to the individual’s core of mental health and welcoming people
from that understanding. To
that end, they decided to offer a karaoke evening, serving coffee, donuts,
and love. The people responded cautiously at first then more
enthusiastically as they felt the unconditional love from the staff. The
staff didn’t teach their guests the Principles. By this time, the
providers understanding of who we really are had stabilized their own
lives considerably so they were well grounded in their mental health; they
lived more of the time in deep feelings of appreciation for what they had
found as individuals. The deep feeling was all encompassing and drew the
street people to them in droves. I
saw the homeless treated with dignity and I saw how they responded to that
treatment. I saw many of them come to life mentally and physically,
thriving on the love and positive attention shared with them by the staff.
I saw that as the staff uncovered their own true identity, that spark of
divinity, they saw it in everyone else. This “seeing” drew out the
innate mental health in the people they worked with; their colleagues,
their families, the people on the streets, trying to get back on their
feet and get their life in order once more. I
saw a man who had been on the streets for 30 years, lying on the sidewalk,
covered in filth, incoherent with drug use and malnutrition; in a short
time once the staff had connected with him in a different way, seeing
beyond his behavior to his divine core, he appeared on a video tape,
unrecognizable because of the miraculous change in him. He was dressed in
a sport coat, shirt and tie, his appearance and demeanor was healthy, he
was well spoken as he shared the dramatic changes that had taken place in
him. He stated on the tape how
much he appreciated the staff that had treated him with respect and love
and had never given up on him. “They gave me hope”, he said, “and I
began to feel alive again.” He had found his true Self. We
never lose this gift. It may lie dormant but we never lose it. If you take
a moment to reflect on the wonder of this gift, it will open your eyes and
your heart and release the wisdom contained within. I
have had people who are incarcerated tell me they are grateful because
they learned about the Principles while in jail and thus were able to
change their habits of thought and behavior that had imprisoned them. I
see that many of these people are less incarcerated mentally then many so
called successful people who are “in the free”. I’ve
had people on the streets tell me they are grateful for the cardboard box
they have, their simple home that provides some semblance of privacy,
preserving their dignity. I see the dignity reflected on their faces as
they find hope that it’s never too late to discover their true Self. I’ve
only shared two examples of populations that have been helped by
discovering their true nature. You can extrapolate the Three Principles
learning to every human being. That is the simple message that Sydney
Banks left us with. We all have the innate spiritual power to create our
individual experience in life. By using this power wisely, we help
ourselves, we touch others and the gift is shared with humanity in the
simplest, most profound way. Elsie Spittle October 30, 2009 © 3 Principles
for Human Development, Inc.
We
live in a world where many are fraught with anxiety. The economy is still
struggling to make positive gains, unemployment is at an all time high,
the wars continue, health care issues here and abroad continues to draw a
great deal of rancor; it is indeed an uncertain world we live in. Is there
a way to thrive in this global environment? Can people thrive versus
survive? I’ll leave you to come up with your own answer. A
fascinating conversation with a client elicited some inner reflection for
me and for my client. Derek called to get help on several issues he was
facing in his workplace. He’d had some 3 Principles training and knows
that I won’t talk to him about the issues per se; he knows our
conversation will revolve around the Principles. He’s experienced in our
earlier conversations that his mind often quiets down and insights and
solutions come from his own wisdom. Derek tells me that he simply wants a
neutral sounding board to listen. I am happy to comply. “I
see our work environment as pretty crazy right now. The stress level is
very high. The company still has to lay people off and in some cases let
go of employees at all levels as our industry struggles to survive. “The
executive team I’m on seems to be reverting back to previous held
beliefs, entrenched in keeping home office happy without having a say in
far reaching decision making. I know they are concerned about their jobs
as well. We discuss in our meetings how to better serve our employees but
there doesn’t seem to be an answer; at least an answer that the team
will listen to. I’ve tried talking with them about how this is the time
to listen to our people not shut them down. I know that if we listen to
them, at least they’ll feel heard, even if we can’t necessarily do
what they ask. “As
department head, I find myself in the middle. I get heat from my boss when
my team doesn’t produce and I get heat from my team and the employees
when they feel the decisions that are coming from corporate don’t make
sense. There is a great deal of drama going on. How do we get along in
this kind of culture?” “What
helps you stay out of the drama?” I ask Derek. “I
don’t know. I guess I stick to the facts of the situation as best as I
can. I listen; I don’t lay blame, judge or make assumptions. I try and
help my team not to ‘make up stories’ that perpetuate the
condition.” “That
is a lot of common sense that you’ve just shared with me, Derek. That
must help your team and the employees a great deal.” Silence
ensues. “What do you think about what I just said?” “Well
I’ve not really thought about it,” Derek responded. “I’m in the
midst of this chaotic mental and physical environment all the time so I
don’t get a chance to reflect much.” “Another
supervisor in your facility told me that one day when you met her in the
cafeteria she was very agitated. You stopped and asked her how she was
doing and she promptly bent your ear with all that was wrong in the
department. She said that you just listened and didn’t advise her until
you parted, leaving her with these words, “just use your common sense
and you’ll be okay”. She said that encounter helped her so much, not
necessarily the words that you said but the fact that you took the time to
listen to her. She told me that later the words you said kicked in and
pointed her back to her own wisdom but at that moment in time it was
simply the fact that you listened.” “I
didn’t know that. I don’t even remember that happening. I do know that
when I’ve felt stressed and someone has taken the time to listen to me,
I have felt the value of that listening. And I don’t mean just listening
to my complaints and agreeing with me but listening with compassion and
neutrality so that my complaints seem to melt away. It seems to calm me
down, even if it’s for a moment, and sometimes clarity comes and I know
how to better handle the circumstances. At the very least, when a person
listens in that way, with compassion and neutrality, they aren’t adding
fuel to the fire by agreeing with my complaints of ‘ain’t it
awful’!” We
had a hardy chuckle at Derek’s comment but then he got thoughtful again,
saying, “So how do you survive in stressful conditions?” “Observe
and acknowledge common sense and wisdom in yourself, in your team and in
the executive team, just like you did with the supervisor in the hallway.
This acknowledgement reinforces and sustains a healthy state of mind where
you can thrive, no matter the surrounding environment. The acknowledgement
of your wisdom brings forth a deep feeling of well-being because you are
directly connected to your soul. It’s as if you are living in a state of
grace. Every time you have an insight, it adds to the quality of your life
and produces better results across the board, in your personal life and in
your work life.” With
a deep intake of breath, Derek said in a soft tone, “I feel I’ve had a
breath of fresh air. Thank you!” Surviving or thriving? You tell me. Elsie
Spittle September
14, 2009 © 3 Principles for Human Development, Inc.
We
have so much to be grateful for in our lifetime. Many technological
advances benefit mankind but more importantly we are privileged to be
privy to new discoveries in mental health. To know we have the power to
create our moment to moment experience is a divine gift, our birthright. How
wonderful to know how to use these divine gifts wisely. An intriguing fact
is that the Principles, Mind, Consciousness and Thought, are neutral in
themselves. With our free will, we have the ability to make our personal
reality whatever we want. The gift of three foundational Principles,
inherent within all humanity, allows us to create a fulfilled life, full
of purpose and passion. No
matter what circumstances come our way, we always have the power to choose
how to respond to any situation. This is invaluable information, knowing
that we don’t have to be a victim. The only thing that holds us prisoner
is our faulty thinking. Once we gain clarity, via insight, we are as free
as the air we breathe. Knowing
that our feelings are an indication of our state of mind is what provides
a clue to maintaining a mentally healthy route. Like a GPS, Global
Positioning System, we have an inner directional guide to a positive
healthy outlook. And like a GPS, our inner guide always is
“re-calculating” to bring us back to wisdom. Isn’t that reassuring?
To know that no matter how lost we might find ourselves at a moment in
time, we always have the capacity to find our way back to mental health. The
simplicity and impact of the Principles can often times be so subtle that
sometimes we may feel that we aren’t reaching people as much as we would
like to. Perhaps as a leader in an organization, caught up in the daily
grind, we forget the power of a moment of true communication with another
soul. We may forget in a harried environment that when we operate from a
calm demeanor, just passing someone in the hallway and seeing they are
upset and taking a moment to listen can be very helpful. A moment is
timeless and can offer respite, a moment of peace, a moment of clarity. An
insight takes a moment and can change your life. It is wise not to dismiss
the power of a moment. Another
way of looking at this is to see that a moment in time is also living in
the now, totally in the present. When one is living in the moment,
communion with divine Mind is taking place. The feeling that comes from
that deep communion is what brings clarity to the situation. The clarity
or solution may not manifest directly before your eyes, but again,
remember that time is manmade. The moment has happened, the connection has
been made, and the results of that defining moment in time may manifest a
day later, a week later, or a month later. Trust
that when true communication or connection with another soul takes place,
and the moment is experienced together, it’s a done deal! Results will
occur. You don’t have to be concerned about outcome. You KNOW the
spiritual process is unfolding in its own time. It may not be in our time,
but in the formless reality where there is no time, all that counts is the
feeling of connection to divine Mind. Elsie Spittle August 19, 2009 © 3 Principles
for Human Development, Inc.
Many
times throughout our life we find ourselves betwixt and between levels of
understanding. We get a sense that there is much more to learn but may
find ourselves caught up in old habits of thinking and behavior. Then a
flash of inspiration takes us to a new level of consciousness where we get
a glimmer of fresh thinking, a new way of seeing things. Sometimes the
glimmer is just that, a glimmer; then the old habits tug at our core and
we get lost in between the old and the new. That
is the time when the simple things in life become so important in helping
us move forward. While we mull over why we are stuck in limbo that is
where we stay. When we forget about ourselves and what is wrong in our
life we tend to “fall into” naturally enjoying life. We begin to see
the new growth of spring and marvel at the myriad of shades of fresh green
leaves on the trees, admire the variety of daffodils and tulips blooming,
of lilacs sharing their heady fragrance, and all is right with the world.
Once again, we find ourselves in the moment, enjoying the simple things in
life. Could
this be what life is all about? Could this be what being in the moment
means? Is it enjoying the simple pleasures of nature? Is it re-discovering
new meaning in long time relationships that makes them fresh, new and
exciting? Is being in the moment accepting life’s challenges and seeing
the challenges as opportunities to grow? These
are questions to ponder, questions to be answered by our deeper self. Most
times I answer a resounding “yes”. Other times, depending on my state
of mind, I answer with a degree of uncertainty. However, the ambiguity
does not feel good, and then I know that I am off track and not in the
moment. That knowing takes me to the present where once again I live life
the best I can. One
of the things I appreciate most about knowing we all have innate mental
health within us is the gentleness this knowledge brings to our life. I
find I am less judgmental about myself and others when I’m in a lower
state. The kindness and resiliency of innate mental health constantly
reaffirms itself, if we allow it to do so. Life
is a gift; the Three Principles of Mind, Consciousness and Thought are
divine gifts that provide us with the ability to create the best life
possible, at every moment, of every day. We always have a second chance.
It is never too late, no matter what happens. Consider this spiritual fact
for a moment – it is never too late to have a better life with deeper
understanding. Isn’t this remarkable? The
Principles allow us to see the past with understanding, unleashing tons of
thought baggage that we may have innocently hung on to, baggage that we
have accumulated because of events that occurred in the past. The
Principles offer humanity such hope, not only for letting go of the past
that is hurtful, but for the present and for the future. Knowing that we
all carry wisdom deep within us to provide solace and the solution to
mankind’s problems is a gift that keeps giving. How fortunate are we to
have a glimmer of this extraordinary bequest. Elsie Spittle May 9, 2009 © 3 Principles
for Human Development, Inc.
Do you ever find yourself lamenting what is wrong with the world rather than what is right? I think it is safe to say most of us do this at one time or another. We do this with our family, spouses and children alike. Nor are our friends left out of this circle of what’s wrong. We find fault at work, with our colleagues, our bosses and employees. We grumble about our jobs. We bemoan the government and their policies. This way of seeing life almost becomes normal – until we discover that we are blessed with three divine gifts; Mind, Consciousness and Thought. These three Principles are the foundation of our existence. They are our operating system and we use them to create our personal reality. The Principles are neutral in themselves. We, as human beings, have the power to use these Principles and create any reality we choose. Once we become conscious we have this power and use it wisely, our personal reality automatically improves. We begin to see what is right with the world, with our family, friends, with our jobs, and so on. A single parent shares this story. “My daughter, Brittany, is 15 years old. We were very close as she was growing up then a couple of years ago things changed and we just couldn’t seem to communicate. Whatever I would say, she disagreed with me. And I must admit, whatever she would say, I disagreed with her. We seemed to have no middle ground. “About a year ago I found out she had met a boy on the internet and was constantly communicating with him. I didn’t know anything about him and then Brittany told me she was planning on meeting him. I told her in no uncertain terms that she was not allowed to do so. She clammed up on me so I didn’t know if she was going to meet him or not and I was very concerned about her safety. “Her behavior seemed to go from bad to worse; I know she was experimenting with drugs and alcohol, staying out late, her school marks were poor. Nothing I said to her seemed to make any difference. “Then a friend told me about a therapist, Abby Nelson, who had an unusual way of talking with people. My friend said the counselor looked for wisdom in people rather than dysfunction. I must say, this approach intrigued and appealed to me. “In my first counseling session with Abby, I found her theory rather simplistic yet there was something about what she was saying and how calm she was that kept me glued to my chair. I told Abby how frantic I was about the situation with my daughter and the boy on the internet, and the drugs and other misbehavior; she listened intently but didn’t engage in probing for what else was wrong. Instead, to my astonishment, Abby asked me what I loved about my daughter. “She used to be the light of my eye, with a great sense of humor, always seeing the good in people, a very kind and caring young girl.” Abby said, “Have you told her these things recently?” I had to admit that I had not. Abby gently suggested that I share my love with my daughter and tell her the good things I saw in her, rather than nagging her about what was wrong with her. It was such a simple thing to say but it struck me like a bolt of lightning. I hadn’t told my daughter I loved her for a long time. With her poor behavior, I didn’t feel a lot of love for her. But when I left Abby’s office, I had a different perspective. I realized that I had totally focused on all the bad things I saw rather than encouraging the good. “I felt so peaceful when I was in Abby’s office and the feeling lingered after I left. Abby helped me to see the good in my daughter again. I felt hopeful for our future and I hadn’t felt like this in a long time. “I had five sessions with Abby and I’ve never looked back. My life has changed and my feelings with my daughter have developed into a warm, loving, and thoughtful relationship. When I nurtured the wisdom in Brittany, she blossomed and soon her behavior cleaned up. I saw that as her wisdom was released, she wanted to do well. All the misbehaviour was her way of looking for attention, in all the wrong places. Now we can talk things over. We may not always agree but we’ve learned our lesson. With love and respect in place, we can handle whatever comes our way.” Here’s another example to consider. Andy has been having a tough time at work. His level of frustration is very high and at one point, he erupts and curses out his boss, stomps out of work and heads for home. Andy’s boss calls Kevin, the company’s employee assistance counselor to ask him to talk with Andy, educating him on the benefits of the Principles and innate mental health. Happy to do so, Kevin arranged a time to talk with Andy. “Tell me a little about yourself, Andy.” “Well, I guess you could say I’m having a nervous breakdown. I find myself out of control. Just the other day, I cussed out my boss, stormed out of work, and luckily didn’t have an accident as I drove home. I slammed into the house, said hi to my wife, stomped up the stairs and went to bed.” “I see. Then what did you do?” “The next day I felt a bit better and knew I had to apologize to my boss. He took it well, didn’t get bent out of shape with me. I give him a lot of credit that he didn’t fire me on the spot.” “That’s a lot of wisdom you’ve shown,” Kevin commented. “What? How do you figure that? I just told you how I blew it and you’re saying that’s wise! I don’t get you,” Andy said emphatically. “Let’s look at the situation from another angle, Andy. Look at what you did right once you got home.” He paused for a moment then said, “I don’t see anything right about what I did when I got home.” “You told me that you said hi to your wife and went to bed, right?” “That’s right.” “You didn’t take your anger and frustration out on your wife, right?” “Well, yes,” Andy said reluctantly. “Then you went to bed. You knew that was the best thing to do, right?” Again, Andy said hesitantly, “Yes. I was just so beat that I collapsed on the bed. I don’t see what’s so wise about that.” “You also apologized to your boss.” “Well, yeah. I still want my job.” “How did you know to do all those things - not yell at your wife, go to bed and rest, apologize to your boss - in the midst of this so-called nervous breakdown? That’s some breakdown, I must say, to still have so much common sense in the midst of that episode. You did a lot of damage control.” “I never thought of it that way,” Andy replied thoughtfully. “It never occurred to me that there was anything good to be seen in this event. So how did I know how to do this damage control? I thought I was out of control yet as you point out what I did right, I have to agree. Yet I didn’t think about doing those things. It just seemed to happen naturally.” “Everyone has innate mental health or common sense built into them. We’re born with this capacity. We wouldn’t exist without these three gifts. The trick is to learn how to use them appropriately for our benefit rather than against ourselves. “What I want you to reflect on, Andy, is the spiritual fact that despite your so-called nervous breakdown, your innate health was still functioning and kept you from doing too much damage. What do you think about that?” “It is something for me to mull over. I can’t quite get my head around these Principles you’re talking about but I’d like to learn more.” “I’ll tell you something, Andy, I don’t totally understand these Principles by a long shot myself but I see the results, over and over again. Look for the positive feelings. That’s the secret.” Andy’s workplace is lucky; they have in place an employee assistance program, based on the Three Principles. It’s part of their corporate culture. They call it “healthy high performance”. Imagine if more organizations, communities, and families learned about the innate gift of wisdom, residing within each and everyone. The world would soon be a different place. As we come into the holiday season with an abundance of material gifts surrounding us, it behooves us all to take a fresh look at the innate gifts that have been bestowed upon us. They cost us nothing; they are freely given. The Three Principles herald a new beginning for mankind to take joyous responsibility for his own world. In doing so, illustrating to others the potential we all have to make the world a better place; to live, to love, to laugh, and to instill in our children their birthright of hope and fulfillment. Elsie
Spittle December
7, 2008 ©
3 Principles for Human Development, Inc.
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